Broken Wings, Soaring Hearts Page 14
Felicia turned in her money and property. “I don’t feel like playing anymore, either. I think I’ll go to my room and just chill out.” She turned to Dee, who was busy arranging hotels and houses along an imaginary road she’d constructed on the shiny hardwood floor. “Come on, Dee, let’s listen to my new CD.”
The little girl jumped up and threw her arms around Jack’s neck. “Bye, Jack. I love ya’.” She threw herself at Hailey. “I love ya, too, Hailey.”
And then she grabbed Felicia’s hand and tugged on it, smiling up at the teenager as she led her down the hall.
Hailey smiled after them. “I think you’ve found a lifelong friend.” She slipped assorted money denominations into the appropriate slots.
Jack cleared the board and folded it, placing it back into the box to put away. He rose. “Yeah, I guess I have. Think your mom will ever be my friend? Or is there just going to be a big wall of animosity toward me? It would make a great deal of difference.”
She cocked her head up at him. “How?”
He fit the top back on the box and set it down on the coffee table. “What do you mean, how? Everyone feels the anger in the air around here. How can you be so casual about it all?”
The old defensive tug of war seared through her heart. “How can you say I’m casual about my mother’s feelings? I’m not, and you know it.”
“Well, I’m telling you there’s much more to this than simply your mother’s dislike for the business. It’s deeper than that, and frankly, it irritates me that you can’t — or won’t — see it.”
Her eyes burned and the years of listening to her dad try to reason with her mother came through her mind. “Are you judging me, Jack?” She tossed her head. “I hired you to do a job and to do what my father would have had you to do. Not to sit here and criticize the decisions I have to make. I’ve told you from the first day how much my mom’s disapproval hurts. And I don’t ever — ever — want to hear you criticize me for doing what I have to do again.”
Her breathing slowed, and she kept her eyes focused on his face. What was he thinking? He sits here facing me with such calm disapproval. I can hardly bear it. Not from him, too. The thought tore at her heart.
“Jack, I love my mom so much, and you should understand that by now. But I can’t be the little ballerina she’d hoped for. I can’t be the obedient little bank teller, or the pianist, or the librarian or whatever. No matter how much I love her, I can’t do it. From what you’ve told me about your dad, you of all people should understand.”
“Yeah, you’re right. If anyone should understand it, it’s me. And I do to a point. But I’m telling you, your mother’s motives are deeper than what you know. I can’t believe for a moment that this gracious woman is simply bitter about the time and danger involved in flying. She doesn’t strike me as that type of person at all.”
He stretched his hands toward her, offering to help her to her feet. She hesitated, not willing to admit that maybe, just maybe, she might need his help for more than just working on the planes. And she wasn’t just referring to getting up off the floor.
She finally allowed him to pull her to her feet, and they walked in silence to the front porch. She settled herself in the middle of the closest swing. The surprise that filled her when he scooted himself in beside her nearly took her breath away. “There’s a perfectly good swing over there, Mr. Stinson.”
“I like this one better.” He folded his arms across his chest. “How far are you going to carry this?” he finally asked quietly.
She gave the swing a push with her foot, avoiding his question. “I told you my dad had a heart attack.” She shivered slightly in spite of the evening’s warm stillness.
“Yes. You told me.”
Her mind burned with the memory, but she suddenly wanted him to know more. Maybe then he’d realize why she had to be firm in what she was doing. “I hadn’t been back at school for very long that semester. Dad was the one who had insisted I go back to get my degree. It was hard for him when I left, but he insisted. Without me here to help him, he worked double to stay caught up. He sat in his recliner one evening after supper and went to sleep.” Her blurry eyes stared straight ahead. “He simply went to sleep.”
“I’m so sorry, Hailey.” He touched her shoulder gently. “You can’t think your being gone had anything to do with it.”
She shook her head softly. “I know. I know.” A lump caught in her throat. “He’d gotten to fly earlier that day, though. Shouldn’t that be some consolation? That one of the last things he did was what he loved best? I have only two regrets.”
“Which are?”
“First, that I wasn’t with him on his last flight.”
“And second?”
She ran a hand along the heavy metal chain that held the porch swing. “That I wasn’t here when he actually closed his eyes for that last time. Maybe I could have done something … ”
“Don’t do that to yourself. There was nothing you could have done.”
“Oh, I know. But there is something I can do now.” She turned to gaze into his eyes with thoughtful introspection. Understand Jack. Hear me. Please. “Families do what they have to do to support each other. My dad could have given up flying a million times, but what would that have accomplished? We are all responsible for our own attitudes, and giving away a part of your heart and soul to make someone else happy is not the solution to any problem. The problem here isn’t the planes or flying. The problem is control. And an unreasonable fear that she can’t seem to let go of. It would have been wrong for us to give in and let her fears control all of us. Maybe your situation is different, I don’t know. I love my mom, even though we have this … this wall hanging between us. But I can’t abandon myself. All I can do, Jack, is love her.”
He nodded his effort at understanding as she continued.
“I respect my dad for who he was, and for me it’s a comfort knowing that he’s in heaven now, soaring with the angels.”
“I wish I could take the pain away.” He leaned his face closer to hers, his voice tender with emotion.
“I didn’t plan to involve you in anything more personal than working on the planes. But it just … happened.” She trapped her lower lip between her teeth. “My dad gave his life to this business. He gave his life so that I could come back and take over.” The pain of missing him stabbed at her heart. “Do you see why I’m so bull-headed about it?”
They sat together, the question unanswered, swaying gently in the swing, neither breaking the stillness of the dark, windless night. Hailey let the whisper of the porch swing’s creaking lull her heart back into a steady rhythm.
She finally sighed. “I’ve sat here hundreds of times, Jack. Praying that Mom would come around. That’s why I know … ” Her eyes scanned the star-filled sky. “That’s why I know — ”
Before she could finish, Jack leaned toward her and pressed his lips gently to her forehead.
It was an innocent enough gesture, but Hailey’s thoughts disappeared somewhere into the darkness, and her heart pounded hard against her chest. She kept her eyes focused straight ahead.
Lord! I’m normally so in control. I’m the one who always takes charge. And then he had to enter my in-control world. I’ve always known what I want! But now … it was just a little kiss.
But it spoke volumes to her heart.
“I’d really better be going inside now.” She heard a quiet voice that sounded familiar yet far away. It surprised her to realize it was her own voice. She’d behaved strangely since this man arrived at her doorstep. Blushing, smiling more.
“I’d better be going inside now,” she repeated.
He spoke solemnly. “You said that already.”
“Then I suppose I meant it.” She stood up with a jolt, leaving him in a gently swaying swing all by himself. She closed the do
or behind her and leaned back against the hard wood of the door. She touched her forehead gently and then touched her fingers to her lips.
“Goodnight, Jack Stinson,” she whispered into the empty living room. She squeezed her eyes shut. Lord, keep me from being distracted. Keep my attention focused on what You will have me to do. Help me get myself back together. Please.
Then she locked the door and made her way quickly to her bedroom.
• • •
Jack entered the cottage and closed the door behind him, heading straight for the telephone. He picked up the receiver and punched in the numbers with quick efficiency.
Maybe he shouldn’t have done that. He certainly hadn’t planned it. But he wanted to. He knew now that he’d do anything to stay near Hailey. To help her.
A familiar voice answered on the other end of the line, and he lowered himself to sit on the end of the sofa. “Hello, Mother.”
At the sound of his voice, the woman on the line let out a warm laugh. “Oh, Jack, my dear one. It’s so good to hear your voice. You sound good.”
“You sound great yourself, Mother.”
“Jack, tell me how you’re doing.” She lowered her voice. “Are you doing all right, dear? I had a feeling you were going to call tonight.”
“I’m really doing very well.” He wanted to get right to the heart of his call. “Mother, how is Father doing?”
“Your father … well, your father is doing fine. I just hope, Jack, that you don’t feel resentment toward him. He had a difficult time growing up with your grandfather. He’s the way he is because he was raised that way.”
“I think I’m beginning to understand that now.”
The surprise in her voice was evident. “Good. Good, I’m glad. Always remember, Jackie, your father loves you very much. We must always try our best to understand each other, especially family. He may act like a tyrant, but you know, he does love you and your brother.”
“I know.” He’d already been given the understanding each other speech tonight. He missed his brother more than he realized, and he hoped leaving hadn’t caused Eric a bunch of stress. The last thing Jack wanted to do is take stress off himself, only to put it on someone else. “How is Eric?”
His mother let out a laugh. “Managing your father a bit better than you did, I’ll admit. Eric knows how to step around Father’s moods. He’ll do just fine, I’m thankful to say.”
“I’m glad.” He let out a relieved breath. “I did the right thing in leaving, Mother. It was the best thing for all of us.”
“I agree, darling. You have your life to live. If you’d stayed, I’m sad to say, Father probably never would come around. I miss you terribly, but it’s enough just knowing you’re happy.”
She hesitated. “You are happy, aren’t you Jackie? I hope you’ve found what you’re looking for.”
He hesitated. Peace and fulfillment was what he was looking for. The events of the month tumbled through his mind and he couldn’t help but smile to himself. “I may not have totally found what I set out for. But then, I may have found even more than I was looking for.” But that’s a discussion for another time.
“Mother, may I speak to Father?”
The silence on the other end seemed deafening. “Why don’t you wait a bit longer, dear? Just until Marshall’s had a chance to come to terms with your leaving. Just a little more time will make a world of difference. He misses you, I know. But you know his silly pride.”
“All too well, I’m afraid.”
“Someday soon, Jack. It would be better if you’d talk to him then.”
As Jack said goodbye to his mom and returned the receiver to its cradle, an overpowering urge to see his father came over him. He could no longer allow anger and ego to stand between them.
What was it Dee said? Her words still rang in his ears. Something about how Jesus wouldn’t be mad. From the mouth of babes — “and the little children shall lead them.” — The thought popped into his head; from where, he didn’t remember, but he knew he’d heard it somewhere.
If only he could recall some of those Bible stories he’d learned as a child. They never seemed to pertain to him before. They seemed as remote as the good childhood memories he tried to remember.
The thoughts running around in his memories were confusing and at the same time, comforting. How far should a person go in carrying out their father’s will?
That was something he suddenly felt he had to learn for himself.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
Swaying in the swing her dad made, enjoying the comfort of the porch he’d built, Hailey closed the Bible in her lap.
A smile touched her lips. This was the best part of the day. I love it when I can get up early and have the beginning of the day all to myself.
Her quiet time was especially good this morning. She’d gotten up even earlier than usual and settled herself on the front porch swing, sipping hot raspberry herb tea and reveling in her quiet time. She certainly felt calmer than she had the night before.
She reached down to run a gentle hand through the hair on Kisses’s back. “Hey old boy. Sleepy head.” It was an added comfort to have her dear friend snooze at her feet. “Lazy dog,” she chuckled. “What’d you do? Stay out all night last night chasing fireflies or patrolling the property for stray cats?” She tousled his head. “Okay, sleep then, lazy bones. But tonight you’re going to bed early.”
Hailey rose from the swing, stepping over the big pile of chocolate colored dog. Tiptoeing back through the living room and to the kitchen, she set her Bible on the counter top and rinsed her tea cup, setting it in the sink. A little spark of excitement made its way through her.
She walked from the sink to the back door. I’m not gonna be uncomfortable about that friendly little show of affection.
She let the heavy storm door close behind her and started down the back porch steps. It was going to be another scorcher, no doubt about it, she knew that already.
Last night was last night. Over and done. Today’s a brand new day. She paused to gaze up into the cloudless blue sky.
There was nothing as peaceful as the clean freshness of a brand new day, especially one when she hadn’t had to face her mom’s unhappy face yet.
She stole a look at the cottage as she tread up the yellow brick pathway. As peaceful as it looked outside, she could imagine what it was like inside. Jack must be scurrying around readying himself for work. Probably just now shaving. Or rolling up his shirt sleeves. She shook her head softly. Oh, good grief. Gotta stop thinking about him.
She turned her face away. Silly putting so much into a simple kiss on the forehead. He’s probably thinking no wonder Mark went into the priesthood.
Okay, Lord. Remember what we talked about this morning? You and I decided to put last night behind me and push forward. And You’re going to help me.
She stopped before the hangar doors and gave herself a good mental shaking. I am glad that I told Jack more about my dad. Because now he understands my determination. Maybe we’d even work as more of a team. Like dad and I were. The Blue Yonder Flyers.
With a wide smile tipping her lips, she reached for the hangar doors and pulled back the latch that held the doors secure.
Flinging the doors wide, she let out a gasp that sucked every ounce of breath from her body. Hailey felt as if someone had punched her in the stomach with a bowling ball. Her knees buckled and she caught herself against one of the doors. The scene before her eyes was way beyond her wildest comprehension.
Someone somehow had taken something and smashed her planes to death.
Supporting herself against the door, Hailey struggled to find her breath.
She didn’t hear Jack coming up behind her.
“Good morning, boss … ” His voice trailed at the sight of her face. He walked up beside her
, gaping in amazement at what he saw. “What in the — ”
Hailey barely heard him. She looked at one windshield, smashed but still hanging in the frame like a million microscopic spider webs. The rudder was ripped completely off, and the door leading to the cockpit now bore deep pits as if it had been crushed with a sledge hammer. It was now nearly impossible to read the carefully scripted lettering on the side of the Skycat III through all the damage.
Jack touched her shoulder. “Hailey.”
She brushed his hand aside numbly and wheeled around to face him, beating her clenched fists against his chest. “Tell me you don’t know anything about this.”
Tears found their way to her stunned eyes and her whole body shook uncontrollably. All reason escaped her and she lashed out at the closest target. “Why? Why?”
He eyed her in astonishment. “You can’t possibly think … ” He grasped her firmly by the shoulders. “Hailey, listen to me. How on earth could you think I even remotely had anything to do with this? I’ve given you no reason to even suspect … this is ridiculous!”
She twisted her body from side to side, writhing to free herself from his grip. “I don’t want your hands on me. I don’t want anything to do with you!”
“What? Hailey — ”
“Get away from me! Do you hear?” She spoke through teeth clenched so tightly that searing pain raced through her jaw. “I want you out of here and don’t you ever come near me or my aircraft again!”
He struggled to hold her still. “Stop it,” he commanded. “Stop it right now and talk some sense to me.”
She kicked at him. “I’ll never forgive you. Let me go and get off my property or I’ll have you arrested.”
He dodged her angry kicks and pulled her tight against him to stop her struggles. “You’re going to listen to me, do you hear me, Hailey?”
One foot connected with his shin bone and he grimaced, tightening his grip on her. “You’re something else, you know that?”